April 7, 2009

“Make your own dinner children, I’m finding friends on Facebook!”

Originally published at A Mom’s Life, my blog at Chicago Parent Magazine.

Raise your hand if you have blown off your kids in the last week due to your overwhelming desire to follow someone on Twitter, update your status, or take the “What kind of Crayola Crayon Are You?” quiz on Facebook.

(You may even have your Facebook page up in the background right now…I do.)

But recently, I’ve been chatting with other moms who have admitted to secretly trading time with their real children for the virtual connection, random vacation photos, and continual updates from people they may not have seen in 20 years; and honestly may not have chosen to see but felt guilty about ignoring said person’s friend request.

We might be busy poking and following and sending virtual puppies to people we hardly know, while the very real people in our lives have come to learn that sometimes we become hearing impared so it’s best not to bug us mid-tweet unless someone is bleeding.

This growing behavior among moms has begun to unsettle and down right scare me a little.  Because I’m one of them. Will our kids’ memories of us be over-peppered with images of us staring into a glowing flat screen telling them we’ll look at their artwork from school right after we finish poking the guy who sat behind us in 9th grade chemistry class?

Kind of makes my tummy turn.

I remember going to a big BlogHer Conference in Chicago a few years ago with hundreds of women bloggers, many of them moms.  I was a new blogger myself and wanted to check out this web-based sorority of tech savvy moms.  I learned a lot and was inspired by many cool women, but recall having a strong nagging feeling that there may be a serious mom-blog backlash headed our way.  I envisioned loads of 20-something kids on therapy couches disparaging all of us for ignoring them when they were little as we sat, fingers flying, writing about the joys of motherhood.  Yikes.

By the way, I recognize that there are many mom bloggers who choose not to breastfeed, rock-to-sleep, and pretend to play with their kids while holding their computers on their laps.

Amen to that.

I just think for moi, it might be time for some self-imposed screen-time limits…just like the ones I give my kids.

So, as part of my own rehabilitation I’ve made a decision to unplug myself from 3:00-8:00pm, the five hours my little dudes are at home. No e-mails, no Facebook, no computer, nothin’.

We already eliminated TV during the week so I’m good on that front.

Having school-aged kids makes my screen-time sacrifice a little easier to swallow. I have all day to be on-line if I choose…which would be a bad choice, I’m aware.

So, if you are a Facebook friend of mine and you catch me falling off the wagon, you have the right to send me a virtual lump of coal or slap on the wrist. I just may poke you back really hard.

Anybody else out there feel like it’s time to step away from the screen??

Let me know what you’re thinking.